Singer/songwriter, burlesque performer, actor, writer, and World’s Hairiest Bartender… Johnny Di Sciascio is a man wearing many hats (and sometimes little else). With new numbers in his broad repertoire ranging from gleefully raunchy to heartfelt, he’s a welcome addition to the Night of 1000 Thots roster of performers!
Thotyssey: Johnny, hello again! How was your Pride?
Johnny Di Sciascio: Hiiiiii! Pride was great! I worked a 15-hour shift! But alcohol helps! Cheers!
You’re all over the place! That’s fun. You’re, like, the nicest and most approachable bartender ever.
Aw Jim, flattery will get you everywhere. Well you’re, def the nicest gay interviewer ever.
Ha! Is it easy for you to be nice to all those customers all the time, or do you have to force it on sometimes?
I don’t. I think genuinely liking people helps make it easy. But I certainly have no problem being a cunt if people attempt to take advantage of my kindness. I think the older you get, the less tolerance you have for bullshit. But I still always give everyone the benefit of the doubt.
When you’re my age, you’ll be wondering exactly where all the fucks are to give to other peoples’ foolishness!
So, aside from being a bartender, you’re a great performer, and there’s lots to talk about regarding that. But lets start with your origin story. You’re a Jersey Boy!
Yes sir! I’m from the armpit of America. Good ol’ Jersey–we used to be the Garden State until Chris Christie ate all the produce..
That’s a lie, Chris doesn’t do vegetables! I must point out that Mayor Christie hogged a Jersey beach all to himself recently. I don’t really have a question here, just… Christ, he’s an asshole.
What a piece of shit! He eats babies. I personally think he and Donald Trump should go fornicate on a beach…..full of land mines.
There’s a weenie roast I’d love to watch from a distance! So, back to you–did you always want to be a star or a performer of some kind?
I don’t know about a “star”. I think chasing fame typically gets in the way of good art. I have always wanted to perform–I remember wanting to be a wrestler in the WWE (WWF back in my day), I think mostly because I wanted to grapple sweaty men’s penises and booty holes, which I didn’t realize until much later. But I have been performing since very young, and I’ve always tended to gravitate towards comedy and music.
And now you have a closet full of singlets!
You know it! Singlets and cock-rings, my entire wardrobe!
Were you always writing music, or is that relatively new?
I’ve been writing music since I was in high school. Like every good fag, I was heavily involved in musical theatre. I remember, in high school, starting to write a (slightly offensive) musical about whores in Atlantic City called “Poon-Tang” where the main character had a magical vagina. I thought it was brilliant; the school administration did not. I still think it’s the next Hamilton, so fuck em.
Was it autobiographical?
Well, my pussy does have super speed.
Did you audition for shows in NYC?
Yeah, a shit ton. Most of my late teens, early twenties were spent either doing shows in NYC, or touring in different cities. It was great! But, like the power top I am, I wanted to be more in control artistically. Which is why I started to veer towards my own projects.
What are some projects that you’ve put out there, musical, theatrical or otherwise?
Well besides the porn, not much. I’m kidding….kind of. I’ve written a lot of things, both music and other things over the years, and I’m finally in a place both financially and artistically where I’m ready to complete and release them. So stay tuned, you haven’t seen the last of my very hairy asshole.
I hear you dabble in burlesque!
Yes! Speaking of creative freedom! I’ve been with Bad Apple Boylesque for almost two years, I think! They’re really an amazing troupe! And I get to be as gross and musical as I want!
And on the more musical end of things, you’ve released a video for your song “Too Smart to Fall In Love,” which is actually very poignant and raw. What inspired the song?
You know I love to do shit raw… thanks Truvada! No, but seriously thank you for the words!
Long story short, it was actually inspired by a really good date that I knew would be a really bad relationship because I knew that we weren’t compatible beyond sex, and he was just too blinded by puppy love to see the reality of the situation. The whole song is really a lament on how I wanted to be in a perfect fairy-tale love so badly as a young adult, that when I realized it doesn’t actually exist, I kind of destroyed my own innocence, which I think you need to have at least a tiny bit of in order to let yourself fall madly in love
Well if anyone’s going to destroy your emotional innocence, it might as well be you!
Ha! I’ve always been a fervent supporter of self-destruction!
Did you enjoy making the video?
I had a fucking blast! I couldn’t have asked for a better group of people involved. It was one of those rare artistic moments where everything fell into place perfectly. JD Urban, the director, was fucking brilliant and really stiched together
a beautiful story along with beautiful additional visuals by Sarah Pezdeck. And I’m sure you know my co-star Zakh Flynn, who is a popular gogo boy all over the city! It was super easy to shoot those naughty scenes with someone so sexy!
Is fake masturbating on-screen hard to, er, pull off?
What do you mean “fake masturbating”?
Can we buy this single anywhere… and do you have any more singles coming out?
Yes, yes and yes! I’m working on getting it on iTunes, However it’s currently available for purchase on Bandcamp. I’m working on two more tracks, currently! One song was actually part of my burlesque acts, so it’s a little vulgar! But the message is pretty important.
Spicy! IF you every put out a full length album, do you have a title in mind?
You know, I wrote a song a few years ago that I thought would be a perfect album title. It’s called “Social Suicide,” because I personally think it’s the best way to die–figuratively speaking, of course! I’ve found there’s nothing more liberating than being free of all shame, especially in the face of an endlessly judgmental community. And I think that’s one of my goals in life… to devoid my self of all shame. I think it’s the most pointless man-made emotion.
Me too!! I think it’s gonna be great!
Okay, anything else you wanna discuss or promote?
Thank you! I have nothing else to further promote except that I don’t have a gag reflex. #talent
You’ve been promoting that long enough! Okay, last question… for, like, $2000…. would you shave off all your body hair?
Hahaha! Please, I’d do it for a Starbucks gift card.
Keep your cards at home, thots, we like him furry! Thanks, Johnny!