A monthly column by Thotyssey’s favorite ex-pornstar and current sexpert.
Which members of the gay community would those with elitist attitudes consider to be “undesirables” among us?
Blacks. Asians. Middle Easterners, as well as older and heavier males of any color/ethnicity, including whites.
The reason this is the case is because this definition of “undesirables” is determined by the elitist attitudes of those who are for the most part, young, seemingly fit white males and bougie people of color, w. Who are carrying on ignorance taught by those who used to be seen as “beautiful” who now run gay media, porn, and nightlife.
For whites and lighter people of color, being placed on such a pedestal can easily go to their head–to the point of them demanding more than they deserve from others, or others willing to give it to them with or without their asking as a means to feel they are part of the “in” crowd. In my 15 years being out and sexually active, I have seen a great deal of this at play.
One of the reasons I stopped going to NY Jock Party was because I saw so many whites and lighter people of color treating Asians like their fluffers. An Asian would be giving a group of whites blowjobs. A white or light-complexioned person would be standing nearby, and get invited to join the standing group. Closing the Asian in because they never acknowledged, therefore never invited the Asian down on his knees sucking their dicks to stand and be one of them. Then the white or light people of color would take their cocks away from the Asian to go play with their clones.
However, the most famous scenario in the gay community when someone who does not fit the racist, ageist, and gym-obsessed credentials imposed by gay media, nightlife, and porn uses a single white or light Latino to create a chain of good-looking whites and light people. Giving these guys drugs and/or a place to have sex. And those guys almost never touch the host. In the small percentage of the time one of them does have sex with the host, they do so as payment for the drugs and/or place to have sex. A host who is in the
aforementioned word, “undesirable.”
Based on my observations and firsthand experiences, most of those who make these environments for the “pretty” whites and light people of color are older and/or heavyset white males. Then you have Asians like the one in a recent Gaily Grind post who only dates whites claiming to “feel the white race is the superior one today.” Or the sole black guy taking numerous trips to the bathroom in a bar/club always leading a bunch of
whites and light complexioned people.
They see young whites and light people of color as the “socially acceptable” colors to be around,. Meanwhile, they have allowed their self-esteem to be worn down to the point of seeing their own older, heavier, and/or medium to dark skin as “undesirable”. So they now feel acts enabling these younger ones to have “fun” is their way to social acceptability. However, if they come across as, older, heavyset, and/or medium to dark person of color who they feel can be considered just as “desirable” as those young “fit” whites and light-complexioned tribe, then that person will not be getting too many
invitations to that group’s action, if any.
Well, I have been the uninvited older person, as well as the uninvited person of darker color. And considering the end result of whiskey dicks and coke dicks, that is totally fine with me. It’s the domino effect I have a problem with.
This brings me to go more into talking about the black “undesirables”. Making themselves truly undesirable by being the go-to for drugs and host of all-light sex parties. While one part of me feels pity for the blacks who do this, I am even more so enraged by them. For so many of them doing this in gay nightlife over time is why:
- I was once taken off the dancefloor at the Roxy (good riddance), and searched by security who were also males of color claiming I fit a description;
- I have had numerous white and light patrons of color, as well as a bartender and a go-go boy approaching me to ask if I knew where to get drugs.
And I know I am not the only drug-free black male who has experienced this. So if any black male reading this didn’t know before why you were experiencing such instances, let this part of this post tell you who to blame. For their self-loathing making them cater and enable the growth of such racist stereotypes has fell over onto interrupting your socializing and sexual pleasure.
This leads me to close by explaining why since I am to write the sex column for Thotyssey, does it seem that I am writing a more social issue, instead of a sexual one.
It is because this actually is a sexual issue. For my goal since my days in porn has always been to inspire physically and emotionally healthy sex. With that said, there is no physically and emotionally healthy sex when it’s sex under false pretenses. Or when you will feel guilt in doing it, even if you’re not aware of the guilt. The fact is you used a human being to get drugs. You led someone on. All of those things contribute to guilt, which will prevent the satisfaction and fulfillment one should feel after sex.
So if you’re envying these whites and light-complexioned people who play this game for the sex they are having, DON’T. For their tactics in obtaining drugs and places to fuck are like the drugs they are using. They only give the illusion of fulfillment. Hence why they keep coming back for more. They keep coming back desperate, and on the hunt. Repeating this ugly cycle of using people.
Take that repetition as Karma kicking them in the nuts and ass for every fuck, and in whatever part they take the drugs in for never learning their lesson. Meanwhile, I am advising you to maintain your integrity in how you get your sexual encounters. So you will not have the negative comeuppance the aforementioned will.
LeNair Xavier can be found frequently at the Cock, and at various other exhibitionist-friendly venues. He has a blog called L’s X-Ray Vision, and can be followed on Facebook, Tumblr, Twitter and Instagram. He guest blogs occasionally for Kiroo.com.