Former naval engineer, future star lawyer, current bar babe: Bastian!
Bar(s) that I work at: Phoenix Bar
How long I’ve worked there: August 2025
What are my shifts: Sunday, Wednesday, Friday nights
What makes this bar great: Phoenix’s greatest strength is the unpredictability the night brings. You may show up and there’s a drag show. Or a jocktsrap night. Or just a simple pool league game with happy hour specials all day. The chaos and unpredictability of it all is the allure, and it’s one of the reasons I love working here. In short, you’re going to have an entertaining and memorable night where you end up thinking “That wasn’t in my bingo card, but I’m glad I went!”
Best drink I make: I like to make a purple lollipop since it tastes pretty much like a gummy bear with almost the same amount of alcohol as a Long Island. Most of the time when the college girls show up asking for something “sweet and strong, but like I don’t wanna taste it,” this is what I make. I recommend only one unless you want to be carried out (I will not be the one carrying you).
I love it when customers: Have their order completely ready before coming up to the bar. I’m sure every bartender says this, so I’m unsure why it’s still a thing honestly. More than that, I love when customers say hello before ordering. I think it’s the acknowledgement that even though we’re behind the bar, we are people. I don’t need you to ask me about my night or anything (and prefer you don’t if it’s busy), just a quick hello that tells me you have some decorum.
I hate it when customers: Drop a glass and tries to pick up the shattered glass. When you’re inebriated you aren’t aware of your impaired motor skills. We don’t tell you not to touch it because we want to shame you, it’s because we don’t want to see you slice yourself open. Apologize and keep it moving – I promise we’re over it as soon as it’s cleaned up. Oh and PLEASE read the signs posted about the $20 dollar minimum on credit card sales. Don’t shoot the messenger, I could care less.
Craziest thing I’ve seen here: Ask me in person, it would be unethical to put on a public blog 😂
Other places I’ve worked: Nowhere else in NYC, but I’ve worked in bars in Saint Louis, MO; Nashville, TN; Norfolk, VA; and guest bartended a few times in DC.
My hometown: Saint Louis, MO (Shoutout to the Cardinals)
Stuff I do when I’m not bartending: I’m currently in school full time finishing up my undergrad in Law & Society at John Jay, so the courseload takes up a significant amount of time. When I’m not doing that, I’m in the gym or a drag show of some kind (please support queer art).
Single or Taken: Me and my therapist are taking things slow 🥰
Who/what turns me on: Emotional maturity and clear communication 🥵🥵🥵
Favorite music: EDM music has me in a chokehold (John Summit, Seven Lions, Illenium, Slander, etc.) but honestly, I really do find beauty in just about any music genre. I’m usually on aux when I’m working, so that will probably give you a better idea than me listing off a complete discography. Also it would be annoyingly long.
Favorite movie or TV show: Eternal Sunshine of a Spotless Mind. If you haven’t seen it and don’t want spoilers, go to the next section now… Okay, that being said I think it beautifully captures the complexity of relationships and emotions that we have. What makes the movie stand out the most to me is the reverse timeline in which you are starting at the end and seeing how things were. It’s heartbreaking, raw, and above all else, relatable.
Favorite drag queen: Lexington Banks is my #1 right now. Her look is refined, her moves are sharp and intentional, and she is actually funny without the stereotypical drag insults. No notes.
My drag name would be: Thera P. (The girls who get it, get it)
Favorite gogo boy: Mateo is my baby boy. He knows how to move and he’s very… gifted.
Favorite DJ: Talia Fortune does not miss. The level of scrutiny she puts in to her craft is honestly inspiring. I have never heard her have a bad night, but she will insist that it needs work. Humility is a lost art, and a DJ who knows how to cater to a crowd is an endangered species yet somehow, she continues to be both.
Other stuff you need to know about me: I was a gas turbine electrical engineer in the Navy for the 7 years (I got out July 2025). Being in an engine room for 7 years means my hearing is shot. If I tell you I need you to speak up, it isn’t me being a dick. I literally cannot hear you.
Follow me on: Insta
Tip me at: Cashapp
Thotyssey 