Sporting a lovely disposition and live vocals, Betty Buttonz has charmed nearly the entire drag fandom community of New Jersey… and New Yorkers are now along for the ride!
Thotyssey: Betty, hello! How is September treating you so far?
Betty Buttonz: Hello darling! September is flying by. What we like to call “local summer” here on the Jersey Bayshore is the loveliest time of year. No pumpkin spice yet for this diva!
Like many of your Jersey sisters, you’re commonly found performing in all the Asbury Park drag-friendly venues. But uniquely, you also pretty much pop up all over the state! How do you and these spread-out venues find each other?
It’s true, I do get around! My drag artistry is really focused on community building, and that takes me to many special places across the tri-state for fundraisers, Pride events and the like. I live in Atlantic Highlands, NJ – a charming little town that is home to a lot of progressives and creatives (and reachable by a delightful ferry ride from Manhattan!). I produced my first show at the AH Arts gallery space in 2023, and the community support and turnout was so incredible that it really motivated me to up my game both as a performer and a producer. My best sister Aya Vlasheez has a similar approach to producing, performing and community building. Aya is resident queen at the Beach Gallery in Keansburg, and I am resident Queen at Et Al Fine Food in Highlands; we work a lot together. We crowned ourselves (is auto-coronation a thing? haha) the “Queens of the Bayshore,” and created the Haus of MonMouth to bring drag to new audiences on the Bayshore. While there is a vibrant drag scene in Asbury, there wasn’t much drag in our area. It’s been thrilling to build one, and see there’s a real appetite for it!
Are you a native of that area?
I moved to AH from the city in 2020, and fell in love with it. It’s actually like living in a Hallmark movie, in the best way. It’s also close enough to Asbury Park that I am connected to the community there.
Did you have a background in performance and activism prior to drag?
My mother is Ms. Cee’Mour Cox, who has been hosting a weekly drag show in Asbury for over 20 years — an institution, and probably the longest running drag production in the history of NJ (someone prove me otherwise).
I didn’t have much of a performance background, but always loved to sing. Drag hadn’t occurred to me until I got divorced and turned 40, and realized I needed a creative outlet and a way to respond to the growing anti-drag sentiment out there. I decided the best midlife crisis I could have would involve a wig and heels, and here we are! I am a live singing diva — mostly performing live vocals, with a pretty eclectic mix of material.
Do you have a favorite number you like to do?
That’s like asking who’s your favorite child, haha! A crowd-pleaser song this summer was 4 Non Blondes’ “What’s Up” — I love it when my numbers turn into a great big singalong, and that tune never fails to get people joining in on the fun. I do a lot of Bette Midler, one of my absolute icons. I was inspired in many ways by Bette, in addition to the comic starlet from the 40s and 50s Betty Hutton (whose material I also love).
Last April I worked with a dear friend, Nic Cowles, to produce a show at The Stonewall Inn with a live band. I did a lot of folk and 70s material, including a lot of covers of Canadian songwriters (I hail from the Great White North, originally). Stay tuned for an upcoming announcement of my next Stonewall Inn solo show!
That’s very exciting! In general, are you up for doing more stuff in New York?
Yes, for sure! Having taken a few bites of the Big Apple, Betty will most certainly be back for more soon! I also am a member of the amazing Bushwick Abbey Episcopal Church in Brooklyn and make appearances there from time to time. Mother Nell Archer has been an incredible supporter of Betty’s creative journey. How many drag queens can say that about their parish priest? And music director Vince Anderson is an incredible light in this world, and a joy to collaborate with when I occasionally make it to church. Any queer folks looking for an inclusive and uplifting spiritual home should check it out.
So many of us can use healing energy in these times.
I think you nailed it. People are hungry for joy, comfort, community and connection in these dark times, and drag offers so much of that. My mission is to spread love, and hopefully create spaces where everyone feels safe to be their most authentic selves.
New Jersey drag has kind of exploded in just these past few years in regards to the number of venues and performers, and even RuPaul’s Drag Race TV representation.
Yes! The drag scene in NJ is exploding with fabulosity! We in the Asbury scene are of course incredibly proud of Crystal Envy’s recent Drag Race showing. But there is such a diversity of drag out there. One thing I’m thrilled about is the rise of the kings. Young talent like Cobruh Kai is taking the scene by storm.
Absolutely! And you are doing your part to uplift the NJ community as well. This Wednesday, you’ll be back at Et Al in Highlands for bingo.
Yes, I’m so excited for Wednesday night. Et Al is a divine spot — a French bistro style venue with a gorgeous dining salon and a sweet bar and garden patio; resident Queen Betty hosts a different event there monthly. Wednesday night is Broadway Bingo! I’ll be singing showtunes, and the winners of each round will actually get to pick songs for a crowd singalong. My special guest is local actor Dennis Daprile, who is as sweet and charming as he is talented. Then on Halloween night, Betty will be back at Et Al for a Rocky Horror themed show!
You’ll be at Asbury Park’s Parlor Gallery for a very special event on September 29th: “Postcards for Democracy.” There, you’re going to be presiding over a campaign of postcard writing to critical voters encouraging them to vote a certain way in the next election.
This will be the second edition of this event, which I put on with a true pillar of the Asbury community, Ryan Jiminez, with Parlor Gallery as our gracious hosts. This time we’ll be writing postcards to fellow voters in NJ to encourage them to get out and vote in the upcoming gubernatorial race. It’s all about reminding people through direct personal outreach that democracy is precious, every vote counts, and voting is important. It’s also a fun, casual evening in a beautiful gallery space, with some entertainment and refreshment… and a lot of postcard writing!
In general though, as someone who performs frequently outside the queer friendly hubs, do you come across a lot of anti-queer and anti-drag pushback from local people?
You know, I’m grateful that I can say I haven’t encountered much hate. Partly it’s because I have some amazing people who support and protect me. Partly because I think I try to project nothing but love, and use my focus on community building and fundraising etc. as a way to disarm the haters.
I produced a Christmas show at Smodcastle Cinemas in AH last year to fundraise for our Arts Council. It caught the attention of some trolls. Their animosity became free publicity — they drove up our ticket sales. The theater was packed with supporters! And at the show we celebrated that. We’ll be back again for Betty and Aya’s holiday special at Smodcastle on Saturday, December 13th — you’re the first to get that scoop!
Thank you! Before that return, in October, you’ll be hosting a benefit cabaret variety show at 3BR Distillery in Keyport.
On October 17th Aya and I are taking Keyport by storm, hosting a cabaret at 3BR Distillery, an incredible venue with fabulous cocktails made from their very own vodka and other products! It’s a fundraiser for the “She Shed,” a local organization that provides free women’s health and menstrual products to folks in need across Monmouth County. “Period Poverty” is a thing which should not exist. We can’t wait to put on our campy cabaret to support such a good local cause.
Beautiful! What else is coming up for you?
October is a flurry of excitement. In addition to the events you mentioned, I’ll be Jolina Jasmine’s guest at her weekly show and bingo at Paradise in Asbury on Tuesday, October 21st. Jolina is another icon who straddles Manhattan and the Jersey Shore, commanding an audience like no one else I know — and I can’t wait to be back with her!
As I hinted, I am working on another one-queen show for a Stonewall date, soon to be announced. And catch me regularly on Monday nights kiki’ing with my Mama Cee’m’Mour at her “Drag Wars” show, also at Paradise.
I’m very excited to be returning to the 244 Spot in South Amboy on Wednesday, October 29th to guest host their monthly drag show. They have new management at 244, and I’m exicted to make my debut in their next chapter! 244 fills a much-needed gap in offering a queer space in Central / North Jersey.
Finally, what is the item in your drag bag that is the most essential?
Ooh, such a hard question! I would say a string of pearls. A practical must-have that has gotten me out of many sartorial predicaments.
Thanks, Betty!
Check Thotyssey’s calendar for Betty Buttonz’s upcoming appearances, and follow her on Facebook, Instagram, TikTok and LinkTree.
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